Moving can be exciting, but it’s also notoriously stressful. There are so many things to plan and prepare for, and you’re bound to feel overwhelmed at times throughout the process. While your child might not be dealing with a lot of the details involved in the move to a new home, understand that it can be an overwhelming and stressful experience for them, too.
Taking the time to prepare your child mentally and physically for a move will help the experience to be much smoother for everyone. They might not fully understand what’s going on, they might be apprehensive about moving, or they might simply need some reassurance and security.
Whatever the case, let’s dig into how you can help your child prepare as you move to a new home, and how you can foster resilience and a positive mindset for them throughout the experience.
How Moving Can Impact Your Child
As an adult, it’s important to know how to prepare yourself mentally for a big move. It’s okay (and necessary) to understand that you’re going through a big life change. Don’t try to pretend like everything is okay if you’re feeling emotional about the change. The more you prioritize your own mental health, the easier it will be to understand what your child might be dealing with.
Research has shown that moving can have a negative impact on a child if it isn’t handled properly. It can lead to issues like:
- Small declines in social skills;
- Added stress;
- Emotional problems;
- Behavioral problems.
It can be easy to “ignore” these issues because they’re typically small. Your child might not bring up how they feel, but it’s up to you to catch any changes in their personality or behavior so you can help them quickly.
Don’t assume that just because your kids (or teens!) are young, they don’t understand the effects of mental health issues. Kids and teens often struggle with the same problems as adults, including depression. Because a move can trigger depression, especially in teenagers, providing support with awareness and communication is essential. In addition, ensuring that your child is eating well and exercising before and after the mood can help alleviate symptoms of depression. And thankfully, there are plenty of other “small” things you can do for your kids or teens that will make a big difference.
Keeping Your Kids Involved
One of the best ways to prepare your child for a move to a new home is to keep them as involved in the process as possible. Obviously, buying a new home is a very adult decision. But, there’s no reason why your child can’t have an input. Start by making a moving checklist with them and talk about everything that needs to happen before the move. They’ll feel a sense of responsibility and even pride as they check things off of their list.
If possible, prioritize their room. Visit your new home before you move in, or look online and give them a “virtual tour” so they start to feel more comfortable with the idea.
If your child seems to be struggling with the idea, no matter your best efforts, don’t ignore their grief. You’ve taken the time to honor your own mental health, and it’s just as important to acknowledge how your child feels, too. You might be leaving the only home they’ve ever known. It’s understandable for them to experience a sense of loss.
In some cases, counseling might be beneficial to help your child cope with the move. You don’t have to wait for things to get “extreme” before you seek out professional help, especially if you’re already stressed.
Making Moving Manageable
Moving can take a physical and emotional toll on your whole family. You might be concerned about putting your kids first, but you can’t pour from an empty cup. Taking care of yourself will make it easier to give your kids the attention they need throughout the move.
Some of the best ways to make moving with young children easier include:
- Planning a route ahead of time;
- Downsizing the items you will take with you by donating them before the move;
- Organizing childcare for the day of the move, by asking family and friends, so you can concentrate on organizing;
- Working with a moving company to ease the stress on moving day.
When you do arrive in your new home, you should also take the time to set up your child’s room first and set them up with entertainment. This way they have a room of their own to play in and they can stay put there as opposed to getting underfoot.
Moving can be exciting, but it’s not always easy, especially when you love the place you’re leaving. Acknowledge your own feelings, then acknowledge that your child might be struggling. If you prioritize mental and physical health and keep open lines of communication, everyone is likely to have a better experience as you start your new chapter.
