The School Facebook Page and the Moms Who Post There

This year our daughters transferred from a small K-8 school to a large public middle school. To put the change in perspective, their current 7th grade class is about the same size as their entire old school. While the transition has been easier than I expected, it’s been strange to go from knowing most of the parents of their classmates to knowing practically none. I was happy to discover that the 7th grade parents have their own Facebook page. As the first quarter of the year comes to a close, I’ve decided that the Facebook page is both a great resource and endless source of amusement.

I’ve grouped some of the Facebook posters into my own descriptive categories. Here are a few.

Helpful Moms. 

There are a few really involved moms who work tirelessly on school events. Their posts are generally informative and helpful, especially to moms like me who are new to the school. I’m amazed at their energy, dedication, and upbeat attitudes. They rock!

Drama Mamas. 

These are the “everything is a crisis” moms. A few weeks ago the school was evacuated due to a small electrical fire. Of course kids texted their parents while they were standing outside, so naturally in short order the Facebook page was blowing up with hysteria, including moms who were incensed that the school had not notified them that their snowflakes were standing outside the school. The horror! I immediately wanted to make friends with the mom who posted that the administrators’ time was better spent attending to our children rather than sending notifications to parents.

Teacher Criticizers. 

These are the cryptic passive aggressive mom posters. One recently posted something like “not a fan of the tone of Ms. X’s emails.” Here’s a crazy idea – address it directly with Ms. X. Posts like this serve no purpose.

Moms Who Don’t Read. 

These are the moms who must never check the school website or read the many school emails or listen to the Sunday night voice mails. “Does anyone know when the school is going to announce the hurricane make up days?” Yes, check any of the foregoing. These moms must drive the school administrators to drink.

Homework Helpers. 

These posts usually pop up about 8pm saying that their child cannot find the answers to the homework and asking for help. I’ll admit that one night recently I responded that we, too, could not find the answers. But most nights these posts make me feel a little guilty for not helping my girls with their assignments. But, this week when I saw one about Civics I asked my girls if they were having trouble with the assignment. They were, but they were working it out on their own. Score. They are learning to handle their own problems.

Rumor Mongers. 

Somewhat self explanatory. These are the moms who post things like, “my child came home today and said that next year to avoid overcrowding those with last names A – M will attend school half the year and those with last names N – Z will attend school the other half.” Do you seriously think that has any basis in reality? 

Someone Shoulds. 

These may be the most maddening moms of all. They toss out their ideas to improve the school, but always for someone else to do. “Someone really should plan a field trip this year.” See Helpful Moms above. There is only so much they can do. Help them out!

There really are helpful posts on the school Facebook page, but the ones I’ve described above drive me insane. I’ve mentally flagged a few “repeat offender” moms, and if my daughters befriend their children, I’m going to suggest that the kids just be “at school” friends so that I can avoid dealing with those moms.