Let me set the scene. It’s 7:14 a.m. on a Tuesday. One kid can’t find a shoe — not the pair, just one shoe. Someone’s lunchbox is still in the dishwasher. The cat hasn’t been fed. There’s a permission slip due today that I’m 90% sure is wedged under a stack of magnets on the fridge. And somewhere in the back of my mind, I’m already mentally rearranging my afternoon because I forgot we have a dentist appointment at 3:30.
This is in the midst of May-Cember AND before coffee, friends.
So when I saw a new survey claiming that 58% of moms believe their families would completely fall apart in a day or less without them, I didn’t laugh. I didn’t even raise an eyebrow. I just nodded slowly, took a sip of lukewarm coffee, and thought, Yeah. That tracks.
The Survey That Said What We’ve All Been Thinking
The study, commissioned by It’s a Family Thing! by S’moresUp and conducted by Talker Research, polled 2,000 moms in honor of Mother’s Day. And the findings basically confirmed what every mom I know already suspects: we are the operating system of this household, and if we crash, the whole thing freezes.
When asked which job titles best describe what they actually do all day, here’s how moms ranked themselves:
- Cleaner (66%)
- Chef (57%)
- Guidance counselor (47%)
- Event planner (43%)
- Chauffeur (43%)
- Professor/teacher (40%)
- Chief financial officer (37%)
- Secretary (37%)
- Chief operating officer (33%)
- Chief executive officer (27%)
Cleaner. Chef. Guidance counselor. Event planner. Chauffeur. I mean, that was just my Saturday before noon.
But here’s the part that stopped me cold: only 27% of moms identified as the “CEO” of their family. Twenty-seven percent. Even though we are quite literally running the entire operation, most of us still see ourselves as the support staff. The behind-the-scenes crew. The person who makes sure the show goes on, but doesn’t get the marquee.
The Invisible Work Nobody Talks About
“When over half of moms say their families wouldn’t be able to function for even a day without them, it really shows how much invisible work is going on in the home,” said Priya Rajendran, co-founder of It’s A Family Thing. “A big part of what mom does is also remembering, reminding and following up to make sure everything keeps moving but this is never really talked about.”
YES. The remembering. The reminding. The following up.
Nearly half of moms (49%) said they remind family members about tasks, schedules, or responsibilities. And 41% said they repeat instructions or follow up to make sure things actually get done. I felt that one in my soul. The number of times I’ve said “did you put your cleats in the bag?” in a single week could probably power a small Orlando suburb.
Co-founder Reeves Xavier put it perfectly: “The overwhelm is not the actual tasks or the amount of work, it’s in everything that comes next.”
That’s it. That’s the whole thing. It’s not folding the laundry that breaks me — it’s knowing that I also need to remember picture day is Thursday, the cat needs the litter box cleaned today, my middle schooler outgrew his sneakers two weeks ago, and we are out of paper towels -again.
Survival Mode Is the Default Setting
The toll is real, mamas. According to the survey:
- Moms are getting an average of just six hours of sleep a night
- 42% said it’s been more than a few weeks since they had a genuinely good night’s sleep
- 46% feel like they’re in “survival mode” nearly half the time
- 18% have never had a day all to themselves — or honestly can’t remember the last one
That last stat made me put my coffee down. Almost one in five moms can’t remember the last time she had a day to herself. If you’re reading this and you fall into that group — please know I see you. Orlando is full of you. We are everywhere.
And for the 44% of moms who also work outside the home (hi, that’s a lot of us), it gets even messier. 68% of moms with full-time jobs admitted that family burnout impacts their work quality, and 66% said work fatigue takes away from their family life. It’s the world’s worst feedback loop, and most of us are stuck inside it.
What Moms Actually Want for Mother’s Day
The survey asked moms what they’d want in place of a physical gift this year, and the answers were honestly so practical I almost cried.
- 36% said hire a professional cleaner
- 33% said a spa day
- 28% said a week without cooking duties
Not jewelry. Not flowers. Not a card. We want someone else to clean the baseboards. We want to lay face-down on a heated table for 60 minutes in silence. We want to not have to answer “what’s for dinner?” for seven entire days.
If you’re a partner, a kid old enough to read this, or a well-meaning relative reading over a mom’s shoulder right now — take notes. The brunch is sweet. The handmade card is going in the keepsake box. But if you really want to make her cry happy tears this Mother’s Day? Pay someone to scrub her shower.
A Note to the Orlando Moms Reading This
Look, I love being a mom. I love these little humans more than I knew was possible. I love this messy, loud, snack-strewn life we’ve built. But the data is the data, and the data says we are doing too much.
So this Mother’s Day, can we make a small pact? Let’s stop apologizing for needing rest. Let’s stop calling ourselves “just” a mom when we are actually the entire executive team. Let’s ask for help out loud. And let’s tell the moms in our lives — our friends, our sisters, our own mothers — that we see all of it. Even the parts no one else notices.
Especially those parts.
Because if our families really would fall apart in a day without us? That’s not a flex. That’s a flashing red light on the dashboard. And we deserve a tune-up.
Happy Mother’s Day, Orlando. Go put yourself on the list.
Research methodology: Talker Research surveyed 2,000 moms with internet access between April 6 and April 10, 2026. The survey was commissioned by It’s a Family Thing! and administered online by Talker Research. The complete methodology, as part of AAPOR’s Transparency Initiative, is available on the Talker Research Process and Methodology page.
