I know, I know. The topic of self-care and moms is played out. We all can’t “go for a massage” or “get our nails done” whenever we want as “self-care”. Don’t worry, those aren’t my ideas of self-care anyway. My approach to self-care is WAY different. Self-care for me is taking care of my mental health, making time for me to just “BE” and also, putting myself first.ย
To me, the secret key to keeping and maintaining self-care time is creating an intentional approach to “me timeโ. This makes sense for everyone and if you have growth intentions (or known to most as resolutions) for yourself, I highly recommend that you add self-care to your to-do list. And while self-care looks different for each of us, its important to spend a little time focusing on ourselves- every single day.ย
I am going to warn you now, this is a long read. But worth it if you want some support when it comes to self-care.
We can’t pour from an empty cup, so we need to make sure that we are filling up ours first.
The backstory
Years ago I chose “wellness” as a lifestyle. Before this buzzword was played out, I was already immersed in my personal wellness journey and had been for some time. For me wellness as a lifestyle simply means choosing better, putting myself first and listening to my body. Each of us is different and each of us has our own path to wellness and that path is something that requires nurturing and a plan of action.ย
During the beginning of the pandemic I began to loose myself and become disconnected from this. About halfway through 2020 I began to practice my 20X3 Method. The 20X3 Method is something that I came up with to help hold me accountable and to help me succeed with my daily “self-care”. It is all too easy to say, “I’m busy” or “I’ll get to it a little later” and then just forget about it. The 20X3 Method is a strategic way that I am able to engage my mind, my body and my soul everydayโฆa simple way that I get to make sure that I spend some time on myself.
So, what is the 20X3 Method
Simply put, it is one hour of extreme focus on 3 things that will propel me forward. They are broken down into 20 minute increments.
- 20 minutes of mind work (reading,ย learning etc.)
- 20 minutes of body work (walking, yoga, stretching, working out etc.)
- 20 minutes of soul work (meditating, praying, journaling etc.)
How this came to be…โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ
I read the book, the #5amclub (basically a commitment to get up and moving at 5am) in 2019. This book encourages you to use 5-7am as a time where you focus on personal time and growth in specific areas of your life that you want to improve on, like:
โ๏ธRelationships โ๏ธWellness โ๏ธMindset โ๏ธBusiness
Prior to reading this book, I already had created the 3 areas that were important for me to focus on and since I can’t get up at 5a anymore, I made my own version of the 5 Am Club (the 20X3 Method) and I use this 1 hour (broken into 20 minute segments) as my time to:
โฐStretchย โฐMeditateย โฐJournal โฐReadย โฐLearn
It gives me quiet time (with no kids) to get some things accomplished. This is drastically aided in my overall wellness. Wellness defined means โthe state of being in good health, especially as an “actively pursued goalโ…which to me, that is what my wellness is.ย
Wellness is a Lifestyleโ not just being โnot sickโ. A lifestyle is something that is a part of who you are and how you operate daily. A healthy body and mind is a not a destination, itโs a lifelong journeyโฆ.a constant pursuit of wellness that requires mindful and conscious living, as stated in an article on HealthCanal. With a โWellness as a Lifestyleโ approach, I am more focused and dedicated to the things that help me growโฆlike new healthy habits and intentional self-care. As a momprenuer that works from home, this approach to self-care works for me. But even if you work out of the home, 1 hour a day can drastically change your life.ย
With a “Wellness as a Lifestyle” approach, I am more focused and dedicated to the things that help me growโฆlike new healthy habits and intentional self-care. As a momprenuer that works from home, this approach to self-care works for me. But even if you work out of the home, 1 hour a day can drastically change your life.
Choosing wellness as a lifestyle basically means you’re choosing to live your life and heal your body through conscious living, healthier food choices, mindfulness and natural remedies. Incorporating the 20X3 Method helps me stay focused on my wellness and I am confident that this self-care hack can help you too!
Wellness as a lifestyle is a balanced approach to life.โ
Everything is a choiceโ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ โ
- what we eat
- what we think
- what we buy
- what we say
- what we put on our bodies
So it is important to focus on ourselves and to take care of ourselves and to be intentional with all things that we do. One area that I tend to loose focus of is myself. When I don’t make self-care a priority, everything else starts to suffer.
Choosing wellness as a LIFESTYLE means actively pursuing the goal of being well in ALL aspects of life and having the 20X3 Method holds me accountable to myself.
Here are some other ideas that you can implement:
MIND
Social media cleanse
Every year I do a social media cleanse for about 30 days…in 2021 I took almost the full year off on my personal social media accounts. While I know that is super drastic, even a 30 day cleanse (no social media at all) is very therapeutic. Headline Stress Disorder is a real thing and in May of 2020 I had it bad. Letting go of social and all news really brought me out of it.
TREAT YO SELF
Get that massage or facial. Take that staycation. Go on that girls night date. Eat the ice cream. Buy the shoes. We only have one life. Treating ourselves to the things we love on occasion is healthy…it is when we over-consume that we create problems for ourselves.
Music, Books and Podcasts
Immerse yourself in soothing music while on a walk or in the bath, read a good book (or join or book club!), dive into a podcast…there are so many options out there. The key is to commit yourself to expanding your mind in a way that works for you.
Learn a new skill
Invest in yourself! Learning a new skill not only expands your knowledge but it gives you a renewed sense of purpose. I love Udemy because I can jump on and take a new class or refresh myself on something I’ve already learned. The Wharton School also offers online classes in an array of fields. If you love to learn, it is definitely worth the time!
BODY
Create a spa day at home
I recently discovered Hereward Spa products that are 100% natural, non-GMO, and cruelty-free with no additives, pesticides, or chemicals. This small family-owned brand single-handedly plants, grows, and produces on their farm. Hereward Spa has all the products needed to indulge in a well deserved mommy spa day at home with lavender-infused oil products.
Go for a walk
Getting outside is a free therapeutic form of self-care. Fresh morning sun provides us with cool air, vitamin D and the sounds of nature. I love my morning walks, even if they are just for 20 minutes. If you can get out there barefoot and do some earthing, even better.
Stretch or work out
During the beginning of the pandemic I started doing yoga and HITT workouts at home. So many people have youtube videos and there are a ton of FREE apps. You don’t need fancy equipment or a class to get you moving. Just search in your apps and get started with a new routine!
Hydrate
Our bodies are made up of over 60% of water. We have to drink plenty of it to stay hydrated. If drinking water isn’t your “thing” get a fun or motivating water bottle to help you power through it. Or you can add some Mio to your water like my husband does (he hates drinking plain water and this is the ONLY way I can get this grown man to hydrate!)
SOUL
Meditate
My favorite meditation app is Insight Timer. There are even meditations for kids. It is FREE and the best!!
Rest
Sleep in. Don’t “get ready”. Be lazy for a little bit. Let the laundry wait. It’ll all be there for you after a little rest. Trust me on this, we need rest.
Communicate with the Supreme
Religion and spirituality, though often used interchangeably, are different. Religion gives you something to believe in, while spirituality offers a sense of connection to something bigger than yourself. Nonetheless, both are important in helping you understand the meaning of life.
Understanding the meaning of life can give you purpose and direction. However, your relationship with a supreme being may influence that meaning. So if you feel lost, confused, and hopeless, feel free to connect with a supreme being. If you’re a Christian, you can learn God’s words through the Bible and study guides like the Armor of God.
Be grateful
I pray every day. I have since I was a kid. It is a habit. But if prayer isn’t your thing, practice gratitude. You can get a gratitude journal, or even just a notebook and write down 3 things you are grateful for everyday. If your phone is your BFF, snag the Gratitude app in Apple or the Google Play Store and try that (it’s free too)!
Remember, Choices + Habits = Results
Cheers to a new year and some NEW self-care habits! You got this mama!ย If you ever have questions, or need some guidance, reach out to me via the comments or email! [email protected]
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